Most people might disagree but i believe that everyone has someone out there for them.. their soulmate. We all go through some hard times during most of our lives.. i guess unless your rich and you have everything, your just not happy with how things work out or have worked out so far for you… I have always had that feeling sometimes when i wake up to a great day.. everything just goes soo perfectly and you keep thinking when will it end when will it end.. you wait for that bubble to burst at some point and you worry about it soo much and you never realize you just dont enjoy that moment for your self, but you choose to still worry about what “could” go wrong. Its only human.. thats what i tell myself everytime i think of the worst that could happen.
Im beginning to teach myself to be positive more often. My positive streak started when i met “him”.. as i mentioned in one of my before posts… he helped me out a lot through it all… I would love to believe his my soul mate and just not have a care in the world and be blissfully happy about it… but again, im only human so im just waiting for the sky to fall on top of my head..
When i met him i was naive… superficial… playful.. it was one of those days that i chose to just take a walk around the place i work.. what struck me about him the most was his ability to give you that menacing stare like he judged you… where you just feel naked and vulnerable. His silence got to me.. he was friendly.. but reserved.. i was soo enticed by him.. When we first met he brought out an image of a cold, unfriendly person… but when i started getting close to him it made me shudder to think that i even thought he was capable of being a cruel person.
He has the most kindest and generous heart i have ever seen any human being to have. The care and love he shows towards me takes my breath away. His the type who would even stay till the next day morning just so that he can take me home, always thinks about my health, brings me food from whereever if i just ask him, always thinks of me, loves me.. probably not as much as i love him but he does..
When i go through some rough times and have issues i just cant handle, it always warms my heart to know that his there with his arms wide open to take me in and sooth me with a calming hug so that i would be happy again.. his love for me is unconditional.. always making me come first in his life.. holds my hand when i see him, hugs me when i want him, loves me when i need him.
Everyday i wake up waiting for things to get worse but surprisingly enough he manages to make things better for me. I adore him, respect him, admire him, but most of all… i Love him.
He taught me what its like to be respected and loved, and he taught me that its not wrong to feel the way i am feeling. He showed me what its like to feel love and made me feel like a girl who has never been luckier in her life. I still get butterflies in my stomach when i see him or touch him. His the most special person in my life and i wake up everyday hoping that the gods up there wont take these butterflies away from me for a long long time…………….
Princess - Jean Sasson
It is difficult to appreciate the privileges that we have until we acknowledge the cruelty around the world. I am ashamed to say that i never understood the terror anyone went through until reading this book.
Princess by Jean Sasson – This book is one of the most compelling books that has been released so far… This is based on a true story of a Saudi princess who has been hiding under the veil her whole life and finally decided the world had to know the pain and agony the women in Saudi go through. When you read through the book there are times where a normal human being who has been sheilded by such horrific stories would look up in horror.. do things like this happen in this world? Alas it is true.. this book is quite a old book… when i was in school Princess was my first book in this genre. I read it and was immediately swept away by the attrocities that surround most women. Rich they are but money comes with a price to pay. The way the author portrays each character and the way she unfolds the story will keep anyone captivated and make it a point to follow princess sultanas life..
Its hard for me to imagine that men like that exist in this world.. but the more i educate myself on this i realise that most men of that religion.. most men who live in countries and believe women should hide behind a veil.. women are only good to make children and do their bidding and give them sex,.. are just pathetic animals.. They are the same kind that hide behind God and justify each and every one of their actions as sacred. They should be firstly tested. I recently read a paper article of a 8 year old girl who was amrried off to a 60 year old man… and the thing was the socienty in Saudi agreed to that marriage.. and the courts refused to let them divorce no matter who appealed.. thanks to international intervention they were divorced.. and good riddance to bad rubbish i say…. These are the kinds of stories the author highlights in all her books… speacially in the Princess trilogy… so i would recommend anyone to buy this book and read it…. it will be a definite eye opener..
There’s always that one great show that gets everyone wound up… for me there are many.. im an avid enthusiast of any show on tv… i mean i watch cartoons and even anime to the extent that im totally addicted to it… I cant stay a minute without watching it. Right now i have to sit for my exams next week. But i still go home and have a list of planned programmes scheduled to watch. Today its CSI… so anyway i finished watching the last two episodes of Prison Break yesterday. All i can say is firstly im damn happy its over.. secondly……… what??????????????????
The original prison break script was written for just two seasons. Thats why the first two were just out of this world. The excitement in watching them. Just to wait and see what michael scofield had up his sleeves was just crazy… and i guess every single prison break fan waited episode after episode impatiently. The first two seasons were just perfect. And i guess afterwards when the money started pouring in the studios decided to extend its run. For me thats where they just went wrong. They took them to panama.. kept them in some god for saken jail.. then released then… then they worked for the givernment.. and then they got two timed and now they started taking revenge… oh wait.. its not over yet aned then out of the ashes rises… their dead mother…. does all this remind you of something… it does for me…. a SOAP OPERA… but me being me i still kept on watching it… couldnt stop… needed to know what happened… and then the news was released that they were gonna axe the show… i felt relieved though afterwards coz i knew it had to end at some point… it was great…. at the end things started happening like they should have… people started dying more often.. and theodore bagwell just stayed on like a bad penny. But do you know what killed me most of all… michael had some tumour thing or something they just couldnt fix.. and in season four they got the best doctors ever and they fixed it… and then when everything was fine.. when everyone was just perfect. Michael was going to be a father and all that…. THEY WENT AND KILLED HIM!!!!!!!! i hated the ending…. it was horrible… you dont kill the guy who made all this happen… wheres the happily ever after?????? what good is it????? where did all my wasted time go? sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
The following note is based on the real life story of Mark and his pussy detectives.(Nothing to get excited, pussy detectives here means lame ass detectives)
It’s quite disheartening to see someone fall…. And fall HARD too I must say. In the life of Muditha.. or as he calls himself MARK…. (First key sign of him living in denial – even though he does accept that the name “Mark” is more appealing to men) things have always been a rollercoaster ride. It began within his first year on this planet when his mother so carelessly dropped him down a flight of stairs and cracked his little infant head…. Although Muditha(Doesn’t muditha sound like a really cool name?) survived that horrifying experience but had to always walk around with an imbalance in his head.
He later tried to fill that unevenness in his life by going out with girls who were either disproportionate in size, brains and looks…. He always thought in his little screwed up world that he was one day destined to do miracles(like all imbalanced people do)….. This stage of denial carried on to the extent that he went out with girls he believed he could “FIX”(yes that is “Fix” not a “quick fix” cause his cool name appealed only to the men). After countless failures in this division he thought of taking some innocent well to do kids(All the kids were fair in complexion) and destroying their lives. So he started up the so called “FEAR” clan. The tagline of the group “Friends Efficiently Armed To Rape” should prove to everyone why they say mark is “GAY”
Undoubtedly everyone who knows mark has been assured that he is Gay. The reason he lets every tom, dick and harry join the team is because he wanted variation in the amount of boys he can touch. What’s sad is that all these kids joined with the hope of one day being the best in the games they loved to play(Computer Games that is…….)… but mark has shattered it all…..(The Games he played weren’t computer games) Because of his messed up life, he chooses to abandon the team whenever he wanted to….. his reason being every time he is back is “I’m the Clan Lord… its MY Team” (Clan Lord??? WTF??? This is starting to sound like the Lord of the Rings).
Oh…mark mark MARK… when will you learn… Everyday you are surrounded by wise individuals like Nigel….(ok, not the best example, but I am too humble to put myself here) And you still fail to grasp a few key facts from him…. Standing up for little short shits saying their your sister is going to get you nowhere specially when those little tots won’t recognize you in a few years… They say she learns psychology… is that true??? Well obviously she didn’t learn very well because if that was the case knowing she was the youngest thing out of the lot she wouldn’t have run her mouth knowing that we will destroy her. But then again maturity comes in and that’s why breaker backed off…….
I believe this all comes down to that little boy who fell down from the stairs…. And had to beg for his friend’s affection…. That little crack in your head mark really helped you screw everyone else’s heads as well……..
Everyday you wake up… day in day out…. its the same thihng all over again.. nothing changes… nothing ever will…. unless you just leave this miserable life one day and just vanish?? is that something you would like?? i would… sometimes i wish i could just walk away from things.. family.. work.. love life.. just go somewhere far away.. rest.. relax.. have some fun. There are some lucky bastards out there who have the priviledge to say that they have done all that… well i hate them all…..
I used to love what i did… my first ever working experience was the best.. the people i met.. were just remarkable.. they cristened me into a whole new different level of a world. After that i thought of venturing into the good old world of advertising. Funnily enough life became even better there. I loved it…. the people i met.. the things i got to do… i just loved everything.. But there always comes a time when u want more…. when things just need to be better… when life needs to be more for you with a lot more money.. not that thye money part ever came for me….
The new place i am in iv been in for the past 3 years.. I love it here because of the fact that its the only place that showed me exactly what i want to do in life….. SEO, PR, Events. I loved it here… till they made me the boss… sighh… i probably have the greatest team in the world.. but the feeling of never been appreciated… Working for an IT company is tough specially when your in the marketing department… when all the engineers think you dont have any work… just coz u believe in having a bit of fun while you work…
The appreciation in this organization is never there… and probably never will be there…. does it kill me sometimes??? yes all the times.. do i have a choice?? to a certain extent no.. i never did……
Coming from a country like Sri Lanka we have always been taught and brought up to the extent that we have to always mind our manners and be in tune with societies needs. Since i was small my parents have always been strict. Strict to the extent that i never got to go out… i use to find some solace in my life onoly when i went to work coz that was the only bit of freedom i have ever been able to have.
In my life i have had the priviledge of been with 4 guys. A small number i know but thats the best i have for so far. The first one turned out to be a psychotic gorrilla. He didnt let me do anything and was soo possessive to the extent that i wasnt allowed to go to the next door shop. As my friend mark beautifully put it… “it was like jungle jane caged” 🙂 mark was always a great person when it came to these things. Anyway he and i lasted a great MONTH. lol…..
Then came along the second one. The cool guy.. didnt let anything falter him.. took things at a slow pace but also was intelligent in his own secretive way. But there was something about him that always bugged me.. so after 3 months i called it quits… didnt think it was right…. he went to the extent of hacking my emails and sending it around.. immature i know but i let him play.. boys must have their fun i say…..
Afterwards.. (You must know all this happened in a matter of months) i met THE guy…. at that time i thought he was the love of my life.. everything seemed perfect. His sister and i became the best of friends.. she was my everything.. she and i shared stories we never have… although they lived in canada we did do long distance.. things were perfect between him and me.. after 3 years together we thought of marriage and the works…. i knew his parents were not very happy of me coz of my religion bt as long as he loved me i didnt care… I always felt something different with him that i just couldnt exactly put my finger to.. even though he never treated me alll that great… i always believed he would change…
During our fourth year… that fateful day arrived… the day i met “HIM”.. the guy who swept me off my feet and made me notice and see things i never thought was possible… the guy who treated me like every other girl gets treated by their doting boyfriends… the guy who helped me through rough patches… always held my hand… made me happy,.. showed me what its like to be with someone like him…. that is when i realized that i no longer loved my present boyfriend. He and i have been having lots of terrible fights and it wasnt going well… been through a million breaks and always got back coz i was scared of a future where i wouldnt know what would happen. With him i knew exactly what to expect. Sometimes i guess as humans it helps us a lot when we know know what to expect. But i chose to evade it all and break up.
As you may know my parents are crazy strict so they were definitely rooting for my ex. Eventhough no one knew about my present relationship. My parents made my life a living hell… but i was always greatful that “he” was there for me..right now we have officially been together for about 1 year eventhough its been 3 already 🙂 The feelings great… im discovering things i never have with him.. he makes my heart flutter as they say…. he has been my only source of hapiness rfor a long time.. and i love him for everything…. and he has made me the happiest girl alive… and i hope it lasts and he doesnt leave me one day……
I was never a person who was keen to sit down in one place and write about all this nonsense that was happening in my life. I for one think that most bloggers who blog about useless information are just downright jobless…. I recently came across a blog that was written by a girl who called herself passionately patient and she added quite a interesting creative peice of writing… that got me hooked…. what followed in the next few days in the world of Kottu was just unimaginable. Hilarious to be honest. There were people who claimed the stories were written about them…. some may think this is just a mere ploy to increase the hits on their blogs and probably to liven up their sad pathetic lives. I honestly think its both. They attacked that girl to the extent that she gracefully bowed down and walked away from the world of blogging, even after repeatedly saying it was all fictional. I chose to believe that innocent blogger. Frankly because the comments that came out afterwords about the so called girl written in the story were quite shocking. I guess even to this moment i find it very hard to believe that some girls can be that cheap. The blog battle became slanderous and insulting…. as a third party observer i found all of this quite entertaining and childish. Its funny to what extent some people might go just to get more hits on their blogs and cheapen themselves in the process.
Anyway that made me open my eyes…. there are soo many things each one of us have to discuss about regardless of the petty things many people talk about. So i thought of making my debut to blogging 🙂 hopefully i wont bore most of you with my less interesting topics in comparison to others talking about how they smoked up and got high and about their sad pathetic sex lives. All i can say is I hope i can keep my viewers interested for sometime.